My Faith

In early March 2009 I found myself coming back to a faith in God.  I know that God never left me but that I had walked away from any belief in Him.  While listening to Amy Ray of the Indigo Girls on the deck of a cruise ship sing "Let it Ring" and specifically the lyric "Let it ring for Jesus cause I know He loves me too", I felt a flood in my heart and spirit.  This "awakening", this crazy moment when I just said in my heart - I believe! had its foundation in my awareness that I never felt completely whole the entire 20+ years that I had done my best to be agnostic/atheist.  God was always there, waiting patiently, until all the hurt and pain had been able to fully heal from the years of having a religion/church tell me I was destined for hell because of who I was and who I chose to love.  Only after this time of healing was He able to bring Leah into my life.  A Christian of a different kind.  Very different then the Christians that I was accustomed to.  She never once tried to "lead me to Jesus" but loved me for who I was and who I am.  Would I have come back to faith without her, I believe so, but I think it would have taken longer.  Plus I firmly believe that her coming into my life was part of God's plan for me. 

The last two years have not been all sunshine and butterflies.  There has been a lot of heartache for me, my family and some of my friends as they struggle with my return to a faith in God.  They knew me and loved me as an unbeliever and many worried that I would return to my old fundementalist self.  THIS DID NOT HAPPEN AND WILL NEVER HAPPEN.  That is not the God I believe in. 

I have struggled for the past year trying to figure out a way to state just exactly what my faith is and who God is to me.  And then of course something I read and some music I have been listening to has reached me at my soul level.  Isn't it amazing how God can speak to us in so many different ways.  Anyhow I thought I would take a crack at what I believe - here goes:

I believe in God and that Jesus was God's son.  I believe that God loves everyone and that my commitment to Jesus does not compel me to convert people to my faith. Other people's spritual experiences are as real and as sacred as mine is to me.  I see God in everyone and everything and I hope for an afterlife but know that is more important to seek the kingdom of God here on Earth, by loving like Jesus loved- recklessly, without reservation,  and without judgment.

I believe that it is important to know about other religions and spiritual practices and that no denomination is "righter" than the other.  I do not believe that yoga and meditating are wrong and that Eastern religions can teach us Christians a thing or two about how to find stillness and the connection between the mind, the body, and the spirit. Jesus is my religion but I respect and honor other's beliefs or non belief without judgement. 

I believe that heaven or an afterlife is for all of us. I do not believe that if you do not believe in Jesus that means that you are going to hell.  I think that a church should embrace anyone who seeks refuge there - even if they are of a different faith, race or sexual orientation.  I also believe that if a church is concerned more about other issues that that with what Jesus was concerned with - like ministering to the poor, feeding the hungry and fighting for social justice then it is not a church that I want be a part of. 

I believe that Jesus died for all of us and not just a chosen few. I believe that some of the most Christ like people I have met do not even profess a belief in God/Christ. 

I believe in the power of God's love.  I believe in love.